I really should practice what I preach…after writing my Switch blog last week, I had my first experience with not giving someone what they wanted. It was not my employees but my friend. She turned 40 and her husband and I planned a huge surprise party for her with friends and family. But what we failed to consider in this big event were her feelings. She did not want a surprise party. She wanted one on one time with me at a spa. What she got was 40 people yelling Happy Birthday. Feelings are complicated, emotions run deep, strong and fast and they are our first gut reaction when someone does something to us.
When we are thrown into a situation we are not expecting, we are human and we react. How often do you overreact to your co-workers, family or friends when you don’t get what you want? Do you react with grace and mercy or do you throw a fit? I’ve been known to throw a fit or two in my day, still do every now and then. But it doesn’t solve anything it just usually makes matters worse, it makes people feel bad, it makes me look like a brat and it sets the communication backwards rather than forward.
“Let my conversations be full of grace” Col 4:6. This verse reminds me that every word that comes out of my mouth must be considering the feelings of others. My humor is not their humor, my abrasive words can hurt deep and be retained for years, my non-verbal reactions can tell people I don’t really care and my moods can mark me as someone to stay away from. On the contrary, my words can affirm others, my humor can make people laugh and my body language can say “Come, sit down and visit a spell” and by being full of joy every day, I welcome others. I wish I could say I always consider others feelings but I don’t. Through my daily quiet times, educational reading and constant introspection, I am learning to consider others over myself. The best way to start building trust and keeping trust is considering others feeling first. I can build people’s experiences of me as positive and that is absolutely showing them God’s love and grace.
Showing grace today, Tam